How To Have More?

"To have more, become more." - Jim Rohn

Two good friends grew up in the same neighbourhood, went to the same school and graduated with flying colours. They found jobs without much problem but realised that they would had to go separate ways. Kenneth was posted to work overseas in a multinational company, while Duncan got a software engineering position in a local startup. As excited as they were with their future, they had a hard time bidding farewell to each other.

Eight years later, Duncan spotted Kenneth sipping latte at a Starbucks cafe in Sydney airport. They were overjoyed to see each other and spent the next couple of hours catching up on old times. Duncan is now the R&D Manager in his first job. He flew to Sydney to attend an exhibition on communication technologies and source for new ideas. He is happily married, with two kids. Kenneth, meanwhile, was into his fifth job working as a technical support staff in an insurance company. He shared his stories with Duncan on his retrenchment from his first job, to his firing of his boss in the last job. His stories could almost fit into a "101 reasons for finding another job" bestseller.

While Kenneth spent the last few years blaming other people, the boss, the company, the government and the environment for his failure, Duncan used his time to beef up his skills. Knowing that he needs to stay up-to-date with technology to progress in his career, he constantly attended seminars and conferences to acquire new knowledge and network with his peers in the industry. He even took up a part-time course and is certified in key skills that are highly valued.

The answer to be more successful in life is to become more. More skillful, more knowledgeable, more caring, more jovial, more thoughtful and the list goes on. Develop a habit of always wanting to improve yourself. Smile more, be cheerful. It helps, whether you are working as a cashier or a salesman. Stand tall, do not hunch. Speak out, not mumble. It shows you have self-confidence. Spend more time on your personal development. It will help you to have more.

Ask Quality Questions

"Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers." - Anthony Robbins

When my doctor informed me that I had cancer at the end of last year, I was surprised. I paused to gather my thoughts. What is going on here? What does this mean? How will this affect me? What are the treatments available? Will I be able to continue doing what I like? How will my family and friends take this piece of news? What kind of support is available to me? Will my insurance be able to cover most of the cost of my medical bills? Questions after questions kept flowing from my mind. There were just too many questions I had to ask but I did not had the answers there and then. In fact, I looked for additional questions to ask by researching websites, like the US National Cancer Institute. I gathered and posed those questions to my oncologist the next time I went for my appointment. And I received the answers that I wanted to guide me through my decision making and what to expect as I went through my treatment.

Had I asked poor questions, I believe the outcome for me would have been different. What if I had asked, "Why me?" or "Why now?". My mind would have then raced to look for answers on why I am the victim of this dreaded disease. I would be finding answers on why the world seems to be unfair. Perhaps, it would lead me to think that only old people should be getting sick, not me. Or I would think that this will severely affect the current lifestyle that I am enjoying.

Why do we make poor decisions? Because we have poor answers. And the reason for getting answers that do not help us at all, is due to the questions that we ask ourselves. If you phrase your questions with the aim of getting positive outcome, then you will be rewarded with wisdoms that will point you to the right direction. Avoid asking questions that seek reasons for situations that have happenened, at least not when you are looking for solutions. Those questions can be reserved until later, when you are doing a post-mortem to understand what mistakes you made in the past and learn from your mistakes.